the more i learn the less i know

and every hour of every day i’m learning more
the more i learn, the less i know about before
the less I know, the more I want to look around ….

UB40


At the end of March I journeyed North to visit my parents and to take part in the Dialogue for Peaceful Change program at the Tatamagouche Centre in Tatamagouche, Nova Scotia. I found myself immersed in a diverse and empowering learning circle where the teachings were ripe and plentiful; sinking deep into my psyche and rippling outwards as I practice daily the fine art of being present, actively listening, and suspending judgement to the conflicts that arise both in my own life and within the lives of friends and community.

Dialogue for Peaceful Change (DPC) is a global coalition that focuses on creating safe spaces where dialogue can take place as a way of transforming conflict into mutual empowering experiences. DPC looks at practical ways to manage all aspects of conflict before conflicts intensify, thus creating opportunities for personal and community growth. When one of the DPC coaches and facilitators for the week, Steve Law spoke of seeing the world through a TIDES (transformation, interdependence, diversity, equity and sustainability) perspective and emphasized the importance of mediating conflict towards a peaceful change rather than resigning to legal solutions, an AHA shouted inside my head. I realized that once a conflict goes legal or violent, in the case of the youths here in the village, than there is little opportunity for the conflict to be a transformative experience where both divided parties become empowered to change.

I now understand more clearly that conflict is an opportunity to transform how we perceive and understand one another; an opportunity to recognize how diverse our individual and collective perceptions of the world are depending on culture, race, religion, class, sexual orientation, privilege, power… I now understand more clearly how crucial it is for all of us to listen more intently to one another, suspend judgement and hear individual and collective stories that are not based on our conditioned perceptions and prejudices; but based on the her/histories of the people all around whether it be family, friends, coworkers, neighbours, community members or the unfamiliar faces in the media that seem distant but close.

I reflect on how to create spaces here in the village where youths can begin to understand conflict as a normal part of life and where conflict does not have to turn into violent words or action. I begin to organize various activities that will help village youths identify the issues behind the conflicts they experience daily, where they can talk, explore, and create their own small steps in dealing with their own issues. The other night I arrived at the community centre to see the village boys pelting rocks through the window and cursing an array of colourful words at the dancers inside the Centre. For some reason I had brought a notebook and pen and when I went into the Centre I sat next to the back door close to where the rocks were flying. I started to draw. The first boy's curiosity had him quietly peeping through the crack of the door. I asked Ken Ken if I could draw him. He sat down. I drew his portrait (keep in mind I am not a portrait artist!). The other boys started gathering around. As various boys sat down for their personal portraits I asked them why they were angry at the kids dancing inside the Centre. They felt it was unfair they were not allowed in the Centre during the dance practices. I asked what they wanted to do if they were allowed in the Centre? They all shouted “Table Tennis!!” One of the issues was the broken tennis table sitting in the corner of the Centre and the boys were itching to play. Solutions were easy after the issue was identified. This was a small example on finding a non-threatening space to listen to the boys; a space where they were not going to be lectured or judged harshly. Of course this is only a small example amongst the larger layered issues of many of the Village kid’s hard lives.

As I write this blog the components of seeking peaceful change float to the forefront of my mind. They are: understand conflict is normal, respect that others are different, be aware of prejudices you carry, know your own needs, suspend judgement, avoid scapegoating, listen actively, investigate what is important to the other, seek small steps, look up you are not alone, honour the spiritual as part of the path.

While saying goodbye at the end of the week a new friend and African Nova Scotia Elder held me tight and said “Girl I don’t have to worry about you at all because you have equity in your heart” and while I trust that I do have equity in my heart and honoured that I was blessed in such a powerful way I also know there is so much more to learn and unlearn and

"every hour of every day i’m learning more
the more i learn, the less i know about before
the less I know, the more I want to look around …. "


A Big Shout Out to the Dialogue for Peaceful Change crew!!!!!

With deep love and gratitude
maureen